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    → 左岸讀書,一如既往。

    朋友說,朋友說

    2019-07-02 . 閱讀: 485 views

    朋友,是你的一面鏡子。——《領悟》

    朋友說:“獨自閱讀,跑步,消解閑暇時光,何嘗不是在逃避現實呢?”

    是啊,一直在逃避現實的紛擾。所謂的現實也不過是贍養父母,結婚生子,房子車子,除此之外,我們總該要面對自己,獨自上路。在前者還不需要,后者還不可得的時候,順其自然,怡然自得的做自己的喜歡做的事情,大概是對小我的最好安慰。

    朋友說:“你總是與別人保持距離”,那是在大學朋友抱怨說。 

    當時心一驚,原來我給人如此的感覺,如今依然還是如此的感覺,總是不刻意的與人相伴,你來,我會接你,你要走,那我就送你。

    經歷過刻意討好,要與人交朋友,最后不可得。當時的熱鬧,經不起時光的錘煉,回憶起來,滿是青澀。初入群體,總能遇到一群有同樣抱團需求的朋友,那是會為了保持同步,適當放棄自己的想法,可慢慢的發現退得有點多了,反倒不舒服,索性踽踽獨行,選擇自己喜歡的生活方式。

    于是,當時在群體里不刻意套近乎,等到分崩離析,天各一方時,也不會功利的主動,只是順其自然。到了你在的城市,我會告訴你,我來了。你要有困難找我,我也會盡我所能。

    保持適當的距離,相處舒服,雖不在眼前,但一直都在。待人以真誠,不需要表面的熱鬧,想起這個人,回憶曾經時光,嘴角輕揚,心里涌起一絲暖意,那就足矣。

    朋友說:“這個年紀了,還不穩定下來,還東跑西跑的?”

    那時離開寧波,朋友看到朋友圈狀態,在微信里善意提醒到,我只是簡單的回復到:“人生不止于此吧!”。

    每次面對未知的挑戰,總會欣然前往。在年紀這個問題上,從來不自我設限,六七十歲征戰馬拉松的年輕人比比皆是,人終究是不安分的,有的人愿意平常心接受現世安穩,有的人就是不愿甘于平凡,一直在路上。

    也與年長者討論過這個問題,為什么我們明明是那種沒有企圖心的人,卻總是不安分的在路上追逐,他說,我們這一類人,對于外在看似沒有特別的企圖,但是卻有自己的底線和期許,在現實世界里求而不得的情況下,自然而然的伺機而動,也正是沒有特別的期待,反倒不受羈絆。

    向來都是輕裝上陣,從來不是負重前行。不在意外在,所以輕松,不安分,得以前行。

    朋友說:“追求自性是思考不來的,也不是努力向外追求得來的,需要自己體悟。”

    那時正因為日更讓自己焦頭爛額,又因為過于在意外在的眼光,讓自己的生活忙碌不已,獨自泡在圖書館里百無聊賴的消磨時光,很努力卻無法享受過程。聽到他發來的信息,一時之間有點不知所措。

    莫名之間有所了悟,工作生活不再多說話,文章也不再更新,朋友圈狀態也盡量不發,人處于靜默的狀態,回到事情本身,而不再以別人的眼光作為衡量事物的標準,事情自有公論,自然也不會急于解釋,也不會刻意的掩蓋什么,周遭的世界一下子安靜了下來,慢慢的回到了自己,不糾結。

    朋友說:“你最近怎么不更新文章了?”,朋友見面客套的問候了下。

    我開玩笑說,最近在反省中,保持低調。

    作為個人愛好,在沒有能力獲得成功之下,優先考慮滿足自己的表達的需求。有的時候,別人不在意內容本身,而是你看待問題的角度。

    朋友們說了很多,真正能入心也就不經意間的三兩句,能說會道不是壞事,但夸夸其談總是件累人的事。

    文昌 北京 changchang01

    左岸

    愛讀書,愛生活!

    發表評論



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