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    → 左岸讀書,一如既往。

    我的生活需要儀式感么?

    2019-03-22 . 閱讀: 1,122 views

    文/古月青箏

    昨天,到書店還書,老板很熱情,說要請我喝杯咖啡。說實話,想喝來著,但是內心懼怕那復雜的沖泡流程(據老板說越喜歡的朋友流程越長),我拒了,老板笑了。

    這種笑意,我懂——我實在、實在是個缺乏儀式感的人!

    不知從什么時候開始,“儀式感”這個詞頻繁出現在我們的生活中——朋友圈里一堆娃娃過生日被冠以“生活需要儀式感”的旁白,情人節收到花被冠以“生活需要儀式感”的感慨,午后陽光里花瓶里剛剛插好的花被冠以“生活需要儀式感”的領悟……

    不可否認,生活中總是需要很多東西,比如意義、熱情、價值等等,這些總是會被各種言論、各種書籍、各種人們在各個時代從不同角度加以討論,人類對這些東西的思考從來就沒有間斷過,它們雖不像柴米油鹽那般剛需,但似乎也并不是哲學家們的專屬思考品,而在如今這個充滿欲望和自由的時代,有關它們的思考似乎被更加熱衷起來,哪怕是被當做奢侈品以裝點生活。好吧,我也奢侈一把,思考一下這些深奧的問題,檢視一下自己的人生。

    儀式感到底是什么呢?我的生活需要儀式感么?

    經百度,儀式感:讓某個時刻變得不同、增加一件事的價值、額外增加一些非必要動作來賦予一件事價值的行為等,其核心要義,在我看來就是一條:賦予價值。如果,儀式感果真如此定義,那么,我需要么?

    好吧,回到那杯咖啡。我在想,或許檢視可以從咖啡開始,哈哈哈!

    生活中我會喝咖啡,也會有自己喜歡的一些品牌,在困乏的時候,在味覺上需要那種味道的時候,就會給自己來上一杯。速溶的,黑咖啡,或者星巴克買的,總之,要么打發困意,要么,滿足一下那一刻對它的渴望,即可。自己沖時,不講究水溫,不講究糖的用量,也不講究盛它的容器;在外買時,不太知道意式、美式到底是什么,也不知道拿鐵與卡布奇諾的區別,握在手上,有溫度,是咖啡,就行。如果一定要問我,喝咖啡最講究的是什么?我想一定是“想喝就要到手”的那種感覺,哈哈哈!

    常常聽人說起,“我就喜歡拿鐵的濃郁”、“我只喝現磨的咖啡”、“我就喜歡看著咖啡從咖啡壺緩緩流入杯子的感覺”,比起說這些話的人們,我常常會覺得自己活得簡直太糙了。有時,甚至也下了決心要提升自身品味,覺得自己至少應該準備一套諸如此類的說辭,以讓自己變得至少看上去、聽起來也是個不將就、有態度的人。但是,即便只是一套說辭,要做到說起來自然,細節上不露餡,遇見懂行的也能指點江山般從容不迫,也絕非易事啊!

    裝了幾次逼以后,我實在是敗下陣來,要知道對于一個味蕾根本是遲鈍的人來說,要生生說出不同溫度下咖啡口感的差異,簡直是一番想象力大作,太坑了,算了算了,還是放棄那有態度不將就的追求吧,糙就糙點兒吧!而像昨日里,朋友邀我小酌一杯,無需裝逼、無需指點江山,只要端坐其中,做個安靜的優雅女子,靜靜的等著就好,我也做不到,為啥呢,看著朋友不溫不火不急不躁的溫杯、打濕濾紙、注水、再注水……,不行不行,我受不了,翹首以盼中那份想喝到的迫切注定會在這種所謂的儀式感中煙消玉殞,“臣妾做不到啊”,要喝,就給個痛快點的吧!

    據此,我想我應該是個不需要儀式感的人吧——我既不能找到儀式感衍生出的價值,也不覺得需要為自己的基本需要賦予什么價值,或者說,相比起這些價值什么的,我更喜歡那種本質需求被滿足之后而帶來的平靜——嗯,是的,我想這是我的真實想法。

    我羨慕那些在儀式感中找到自己需要的東西的人們,也喜歡我這種在被滿足中迅速獲得平靜的感覺,一杯咖啡如此,一件衣服如此,一件食器也是如此……

    我想,在生活中的大部分時候,我們有時其實很難分辨出哪些是欲望,哪些是剛需,誰也不能說儀式感就一定是欲望,誰也不能說“我只是需要”就一定是剛需,本來,在不同的人眼中,欲望和剛需其本身就存在概念上的不同,不是么?況且,身處這個時代,我們早已建立起了一個自由表達欲望、自行決定很多事的社會了,世界以這種邏輯進化已經有一段時間了,所以,又何必去區分剛需與欲望,這么多此一舉呢?

    但是,即便是剛需與欲望無從區分、無需區分,即便是各有所需、豐儉自便,我仍然堅持倡導那種節制的、讓步的、甚至是近乎超然的一種理性,仍然覺得,“我就是得這樣”這種表達意愿的坦率挺好,但更愿意“這樣就好”里品味出的那種更高級的自由。

    如果,我們身體力行一種基本與本質,也或許其本身就是一種儀式和價值,誰知道呢,也許吧……此刻,喝一杯咖啡吧,很快!

    左岸記:《小王子》里說:儀式感就是使某一天與其他日子不同,使某一時刻與其他時刻不同!該有的儀式感是什么,是那天、那個時刻很重要、很特別,所以我們要讓它變得有意義。所以,儀式感不是要做給別人看的,不是為了炫耀什么,而是對生活的一種態度,一種感動,一份美好。

    左岸

    愛讀書,愛生活!

    4 Comments On 我的生活需要儀式感么?

    1. 感覺生活確實少了很多儀式感,結婚以后就慢慢少了很多儀式感

    2. 儀式感不是要做給別人看的,不是為了炫耀什么,而是對生活的一種態度,一種感動,一份美好。

    3. 喜歡的東西和事情,才會給予儀式感。連咖啡速溶和現磨的都覺得一樣的,確實沒必要。
      自己強行給不喜歡不愛好事情賦予儀式感,那就只是裝X了

    4. 還是要回歸柴米油鹽醬醋茶

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