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    → 左岸讀書,一如既往。

    丁丁:禮物

    2018-11-26 . 閱讀: 652 views

    一個玲瓏的雕花木箱,一張張老舊泛黃的相片,微合雙眼,靜心傾聽一頁頁吹起的塵封的記憶,感受心中的愛在流淌。——題記?

    文/丁丁?

    你是我心中最重要的人,卻也是我總厭煩的那個人。我不喜歡你在我上學前逼著我吃早飯,我不喜歡你在我離家前叮囑我多穿衣服,我還討厭你在我考試前對我的嘮嘮叨叨……

    但我最想聽的、卻也最厭煩的,是你的那句話“我是為你好”!

    那年我四歲,只會笨拙地在墻上寫寫畫畫,但寫的第一個字,是你。那天是你的生日,你已經忙的忘掉了它,但還連數字都不認識的我卻記得。可能時間模糊了記憶,我只記得,那兩字寫的很難 ,我不知一橫一豎如何布置,一撇一捺怎樣勾勒,只是照著兒童讀本畫著。但我知道,它對我很重要。

    當我緊緊的攥著那張紙,鄭重的遞給你,期望著你的甜言蜜語時,你卻忙的只說了聲“謝謝”,便又繼續忙碌。我生氣了,我討厭你,討厭你對我的禮物不搭不理。一個四歲的孩子在房中跟自己賭氣。

    那年我十三,需要辦身份證,所有的資料我都要自己找,我拼命的想證明“我已經長大了,不需要你管了”。我來到臥室,費力但假裝輕松地拿出木箱,證明著我“長大了”。打開那老舊的木箱,不曾想揭開了一段溫暖的回憶。

    它很顯眼,與所有的重要文件擺在一起,與它一同的,還有幾張我兒時的照片,他們一起,莊嚴安靜的躺在那里,做著一個不愿被驚擾的夢。那早已泛黃的紙張,蓋著一層薄薄的灰塵,用鉛筆別扭而幼稚的寫著“媽媽”,撞入了我的眼里,沖進了我的心中,那份溫暖與愛被塑封在了回憶里。我似乎知道了什么,心頭一震,輕輕撫掉灰塵,小心翼翼的放回原位,推回木箱,將所有都放回最開始的樣子,假裝急切地喊著:“媽,在哪兒,找不到啊!”

    我得到了我最熟悉、最期待的答復,“你看看你,我說你找不到吧,真是麻煩……”我開心地笑了,享受著你對我的嘮叨,在那一剎那,我告訴自己“我不再想長大了”。

    今年,我十五,每天沒有了你的叮囑,你的嘮叨。我發現,早晨不吃飯會低血糖,少穿衣服會感冒發燒,考試不認真會成績下滑……

    我發現,你對我的每一句話,是曾被我忽視卻又如此珍貴的禮物。

    回到家,迎來的是你的笑容,似拂曉的晨光,溫暖著疲累的心。

    我總以為你給我的愛還不夠多,但想想那張粗糙的生日卡片,你對我的一次次叮囑,我意識到我的愚蠢,錯過了你給我成長的一個又一個禮物。

    媽媽,我不想長大,我是一個貪戀你給的禮物而不想長大的孩子!

    左岸記:大家認識丁丁吧?對,德叔的兒子,德叔在這兒提到過兩三次,相信大家能感覺到這孩子的聰慧。這是他原原本本的文章,這是孩子的語言和他們認識世界的方式,真摯而純凈。

    這篇文章和下面席慕容的《生日卡片》有異曲同工之妙。


    席慕容:生日卡片

    文/席慕容

    剛入臺北師范藝術科的那一年,我好想家,好想媽媽.

    雖然,母親平日并不太和我說話,也不會對我有些什么特別親密的動作,雖然,我一直以為她并不怎么喜歡我,平日也常會故意惹她生氣;可是,一個十四歲的初次離家的孩子,晚上躲在宿舍被窩里流淚的時候,呼喚的仍然是自己的母親.

    所以,那年秋天,母親過生日的時候,我特別花了很多心思做了一張卡片送給她.在卡片上,我寫了很多,也花了很多,我說母親是傘,是豆莢,我們是傘下的孩子,是莢里的豆子,我說我怎么想她,怎么愛她,怎么需要她.

    卡片送出去了以后,自己也忘了,每次回家仍然會覺得母親偏心,仍然會和她頂嘴,若她生氣.

    很多年過去了,等到自己有了孩子以后,才算真正明白了母親的心,才開始由衷地對母親恭敬起來.

    十幾年來,父親一直在國外教書,只有放暑假時偶爾回來一兩次,母親就在家里等著妹妹和弟弟讀完大學.那一年,終于,弟弟也當完兵又出國讀書去了,母親才決定到德國去探望父親并且留下來.出國以前,她交給我一個黑色的小手提箱,告訴我,里面裝的是整個家族的重要文件,要我妥善保存.

    黑色的手提箱就一直放在我的閣樓上,從來都沒想去碰過,一直到一天,為了找一份舊戶籍資料,我才把它打開.

    我的天!真的是整個家族的資料都在里面了.有外祖父早年那些會議的相片和札記,有祖父母的手記,他們當年用過的哈達,父親的演講記錄,父母初婚時的合照,朋友們送的字畫,所有的紙張都已經泛黃了,卻還保有一層莊嚴和溫潤的光澤.然后,我就看到我那張大卡片了。用紅色的原子筆寫的笨拙的字體,還有那些拼拼湊湊的幼稚的畫面,一張用普通的圖畫折成四折的粗糙不堪的卡片,卻被母親仔細地收藏起來了,收在她最珍惜的位子里,和所有莊嚴的文件擺在一起,收了那么多年!

    卡片上寫著的是我早已忘記了的甜言蜜語,可是,就算是這樣的甜言蜜語也不是常有的。忽然發現,這么多年來,我好像也只是畫過這樣一張卡片。長大了以后,常常只會去選一張現成的印刷好了的甚至帶點香味的卡片,在異國的街角,匆匆忙忙地簽一個名字,匆匆忙忙地寄出,有時候,在母親收到的時候,她的生日都已經過了好幾天了。

    所以,這也許是母親要好好地收起這張粗糙的生日卡片的最大理由了吧,因為,這么多年來我也只給了她一張而已。這么多年來,我只會不斷地向她要求更多的愛,更多的關懷,不斷地向她要求更多的證據,希望從這些證據里,能夠證明她是愛我的。

    而我呢?我不過只是在十四歲那一年,給了她一張甜蜜的卡片而已。

    她卻因此而相信了我,并且把他細心地收藏起來,因為,也許這是她從我這里能得到的唯一的證據了。

    在那一剎那里,我才發現,原來,原來世間所有的母親都是這樣容易受騙和容易滿足的啊!

    在那一剎那里,我不禁流下淚來。

    左岸

    愛讀書,愛生活!

    2 Comments On 丁丁:禮物

    1. 我收到的禮物一直被我小心翼翼的珍藏著

    2. 我竟然不夠珍惜,孩子送我的禮物我隨意就過去了

    發表評論



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