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    → 左岸讀書,一如既往。

    而立之年為什么而焦慮

    2018-11-25 . 閱讀: 1,489 views

    文/文昌

    冬天來了,天也開始涼了。沉寂了近一年的秋褲,又開始派上了用場。貼心的小物件總是那樣,不一定華麗昂貴,但能驅寒暖心。中年大叔不離手的保溫杯也大體如此,枸杞不一定要有,不過小心翼翼吹著的熱氣,滋啦的吸著熱水的樣子,滿是歲月歷練之下的溫厚。人到中年,慢慢的要從偶像派的風格,轉向實力派。

    1.

    歲月流淌,轉眼步入了而立之年,誠惶誠恐的審視過往,按部就班的走來,也沒有什么值得懺悔的,一直都盡可能的追隨本心,尋求生命的燦爛。如果非要反思的話,那就是沒有盡早在個人的興趣愛好上確定好方向,興趣過于廣泛耗費了不少精力嘗試。

    在野蠻其體魄方面,籃球,足球,乒乓球,羽毛球,游泳,跑步,這些愛好都先后花半年或者兩年的時間逐一嘗試,每項運動都有他的精彩,運動的激情讓人體會身體掌控的快感,但那種僅為了開心,而不是刻意練習的結果,在技能上并沒有很好的積累,難以有一技之長。最后還是選擇跑步,相對其它愛好,不管是操作性,還是投入產出比都是最好的,這個確定的過程有點晚,不然可以騰出更多的時間精力,做更有價值的事情。

    在文明其精神方面,一直都推崇閱讀的功效,從以前的圖書館,到如今的咖啡館,盡管閱讀這所移動的避難所一直在遷移,所幸他一直都在。如果要反思的話,應該早日開始主題閱讀,也就是按彼得-德魯克的建議,每三年研究一門學科,直到成為專業,然后再換下一門學科。這兩年才開始進行主題閱讀,德國史,心理學,經濟學,整體下來,在深度的探索上,還是有進步的,不過遠遠達不到專業的地步,在接下來的時光里,盡可能耐心的一門學科,一門學科的往前走吧!

    野蠻其體魄,文明其精神,一直都是兩條腿走路的,整體來看倒沒有太失衡。此外不得不提的一個奢望,就是希望在寫作上能夠有所成就。經過最近一段的時間反思和沖刺,慢慢的暫時放棄寫作來謀生的想法,寫作是門手藝,需要時間和精力打磨,更重要的是思路開拓和個人文字風格的建立,如果要達到謀生的程度,那也是很遠的將來,但不是當下的重點,還是任文字聽從本心的選擇吧!

    2.

    反思過去的三十年表現大體還是不錯的,那又有什么好焦慮的呢?這份焦慮是來自當下的無奈,來自對未來前途的擔憂,還有時光流淌之下的無力掌控感。

    隨著年齡的增長以及角色的變化,接觸的事情越多,個人的時間和精力會分散得越多,忙碌之下對時間的感知是遲鈍的,渾然不知的情況,時光像豬八戒吞人參果一樣,還沒有來得及慢慢的品味,就已經結束了。更重要的是投入了寶貴的時間和精力,因為某些領導者的管理不善,缺乏深入的思考和策劃,帶來的方向性的錯誤,忙碌一場卻徒勞無功,這是我無法接受的,無奈之余帶來的情緒的困擾,讓人焦慮痛苦。

    人其實還是追求價值感的,希望能夠在自己所從事的工作中尋求到意義和成就感,但這個希望落空的無奈會讓人焦慮未來,難道我們會一直這樣嗎?如果不是,那又是誰在推動整個組織往前進?我又能做點什么,才能改變這個現狀呢?一邊是時光流淌,一邊是亦步亦趨的無所適從,看起來那么正常,但心底里又慌亂不堪。工作占據了絕大部分時間,它將成為我余生非常重要的一部分,我又豈能不在意?

    那么對于物質財富的追逐呢?本應像很多人一樣,房子車子應該成為我最大的焦慮,但此時恰恰不是我所焦慮的,至少不是階段我必須要考慮的問題,總以為個人的追求要遠超過世俗的房子車子,可以追求的未來遠不止于此。

    那么對于單身的焦慮呢?向往美好的愛情,但暫時還無力顧及,在此之前盡力做好自己,按自己的想法盡可能追求生命的美好。

    本心還是希望能夠在求知上有所成就,閱讀成了生活的避難所,周末要是不出門探索自然,基本都會泡在咖啡館看書學習,當前的狀態像極了當年的大學時代,享受這份安寧。按經濟學的說法,財富就是人們認為有價值的任何東西。當我全身心的投入到這份有價值的事情,通過閱讀看到不同的驚喜會讓人安心。雖然這終究不是常態,哪怕說貪婪,那也是值得向往的。

    3.

    三十之后,對于未來的規劃呢?還是有很多的美好值得期待。

    在馬拉松的路上,見過太多六七十歲的年輕人,依然不服老,奔跑在馬拉松的最前線,給我的啟發是人生不設限,三十歲只是剛剛開始,所有對當下的焦慮都來自個人視野和環境的局限,只要翻過這座高山后,還是會有更加廣袤的天地。

    未來三到五年,主要還是追求自我,主題閱讀方面,以經濟學為主,然后以項目管理為輔,這個主題閱讀過程如果不出意外的話,計劃持續兩年,周末沒有特別的安排,基本都會在咖啡館度過,深度的學習閱讀。如果周末都這么度過,什么時間去找對象?這也是個問題,暫且先放一邊吧!跑步呢?每年還是至少會跑一次馬拉松,不想耗費太多時間和精力,寫作慢慢的不強求,盡可能將寫作能力的優勢體現在工作中吧!

    4.

    人的精力是有限的,一方面多了,另一方面就少了,那就更需要合理的管理自己的時間,個人而言,時間價值最好的狀態是充分發揮了其精彩,領略大自然的美好,在書籍中體會人類的智慧,在生活中享受世俗的溫暖,如此即使沒有大的成就,那也就不枉此生。??

    ?文昌 十一月 寧波 微信號:changchang010

    左岸記:人在而立之年是應該有個承前啟后,繼往開來的反思的,給自己的過去一個交待,給自己的未來一個期望,都是很好的。一個人能很快地找到自己喜歡的,那是非常幸運的。但無論是一開始就選對了,還是歷盡千帆而后燈火闌珊,都只是人生不同的展開模式,或者說是自己必須經歷的過程。回首自己走過的路,不都是自己努力的付出嗎?好好安慰一下自己,感謝自己一直的努力吧,深深呼吸,堅定前行。

    左岸

    愛讀書,愛生活!

    3 Comments On 而立之年為什么而焦慮

    1. 該有所突破的年紀, 堅持夢想,加油!

    2. 每年都給自己定些目標,比如存錢的目標,跑步的目標,旅游的目標,讀書的目標…..讓自己的生活更有方向

    3. 三十,人生的三分之一,就這樣過去了

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