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    → 左岸讀書,一如既往。

    別扯犢子了,正是你的不教育廢了你的孩子

    2018-03-19 . 閱讀: 2,411 views

    文/謝慧敏

    一個筆名叫“燒傷超人阿寶“的作者寫了一篇題為“她給了孩子一個快樂的童年,代價是讓孩子面對一個失敗的人生。”這篇概念不清邏輯不通的文章居然是一篇熱文,點擊量奇高,一天內超過10萬+,100多人打賞,6千多人點贊。

    可見有關教育的話題,總能夠輕易地牽動國人脆弱的神經。

    在這篇文章中,“快樂教育”和“減負教育”成為攻擊的靶子。

    文中舉了一例,一位 “快樂教育”至上的母親,為了給孩子一個快樂的童年,孩子可以不做作業,不去夜自休,游戲可以玩,戀愛可以談。孩子做錯了事,不批評,不責罵。那孩子當然是快樂了,可下場不好:高考成績100多分,大學上不了,花錢也白搭,全家人咬咬牙湊錢送孩子到國外,可這孩子是阿斗,預科班都沒讀完就給送回來了。

    成了廢人一個。

    于是母親痛心疾首:都是“快樂教育“造的孽!

    這位 “燒傷超人阿寶“趁機扯起國學大旗,搬出了“懸梁刺股”“映雪囊螢”“鑿壁偷光”等怵人的字眼:看看,看看,我們老祖宗留下來的好經驗不用,偏偏學洋人的 “減負教育”“快樂教育”“素質教育”。自作孽,不可活!

    哪一個名人的成功是“快樂”“減負”的結果?哪一個不是“鍥而不舍,金石可鏤”“寶劍鋒自磨礪出,梅花香自苦寒來”?

    真理在握呀!

    其實跟這位仁兄較勁沒有一點意思。首先是舉例不當,試問這位母親教育孩子了嗎?孩子愛干什么就干什么,孩子不愛干什么就不干什么。教育必然有約束,有引導。可這位母親根本放任孩子自流,孩子為所欲為的快樂和在學習中獲得的快樂完全是兩碼事。這不是“教育不當”,分明是“不教育”。

    “快樂教育”何其無辜!

    作為對 “死記硬背“ ”題海戰術“的宣戰,對“標準答案”“填鴨式”“滿堂灌”的抗議。“快樂教育”的目的是在尊重孩子天性的基礎上,設置情景,啟發思維,鼓勵動手,讓孩子體驗學習的樂趣,著重培養孩子的積極性和創造性。

    “快樂教育“不是不要孩子勤奮、努力,而是通過激發興趣,培養孩子主動投入、鉆注鉆研的能力。

    教育方式一直處在探索中,有些還各執一詞。但還是有公認的法則。比如,沒有人反對孔子“因材施教“的理念,因為教育對像在個體上存在著差異。盧梭《愛彌爾》 的“體力教育” “智力教育”“愛情教育”得到了廣泛的回響,因為不同年齡的特征的確不同。此外,教育還是一個系統工程,“快樂教育”僅是諸多方法里的一種,孤軍作戰解決不了問題,諸多方式攜手并進方能有效果。

    這個話題必然涉及到教育目的。

    在此君眼里,教育的目的是取得“成功”。何謂成功?他舉了幾個大名人,梅蘭芳,陳景潤,魯迅,這些大師級人物通過“書山有徑勤為路”“把人家喝咖啡的時間用來學習”“夏練三伏冬練三九”,斬獲成功人生。

    “成功”跟名望,地位,權力,金錢劃上等號。

    按此標準,世上恐怕沒有多少人的人生是成功的,像我等碌碌無為者都要在失敗之列。

    可是我從不覺得我的人生是失敗的。我沒有高官,沒有厚碌,也不是什么領域拔尖人才。可是我工作穩定,家庭和睦,身體健康,還有自己的興趣,小日子過得忙忙碌碌而充實,我沒有虛度人生。

    我父親,退休以后,回歸農民本色,種出的番薯又多又好,一家家地送過去,那感覺好極了,他生活得有滋有味。

    我身邊的很多人,都不出類拔萃。他們探險、爬山、出行、跑步、騎游。對生活充滿好奇,真誠地熱愛生活,他們的人生并不失敗。

    假如把“成功”和名望掛鉤,那要賺多少錢,做多大的官,出多大的息才算得成功?要知道,山外有山,人外有人,名利是永無止境的。

    再者,“成功”人物一定幸福快樂嗎?比爾蓋茨、馬云、王健林一定比我們快樂?未必!一個非常有名的例子:

    一天,亞歷山大巡游某地,遇見正躺著曬太陽的第歐根尼,這位世界之王上前自我介紹:“我是大帝亞歷山大。”哲學家依然躺著,也自報家門:“我是狗兒第歐根尼。”大帝肅然起敬,問:“我有什么可以為先生效勞的嗎?”哲學家的回答是:“有的,就是--不要擋住我的陽光。”亞歷山大事后感嘆道:“如果我不是亞歷山大,我就愿意做第歐根尼。”

    一個是武功赫赫的世界征服者,行宮遍布歐亞,被萬眾呼為神;另一個是靠乞討為生的窮哲學家,寄身在一只木桶里,被市民稱作狗。

    學習的目的不是為了獲得傳統意義上的“成功”。教育的目的不必那么功利,我非常贊同龍應臺先生對她兒子所說的話:

    “不要抱怨讀書苦,那是你通向世界的路” “孩子,我要求你讀書用功,不是因為我要你跟別人比成績,而是因為,我希望你將來會擁有選擇的權利。選擇有意義、有時間的工作,而不是被迫謀生。”

    我還非常認同劉瑜給她女兒的話:

    “小布谷,等你長大,如果你想當一個華爾街的銀行家,那就去努力吧,但如果你僅僅想當一個面包師,那也不錯。如果你想從政,只要出于恰當的理由,媽媽一定支持,但如果你只想做個動物園飼養員,那也挺好。?”

    祈禱你能“成功”,但我所理解的成功,是一個人對自己所做的事情有敬畏與熱情。

    這不是一個最好的社會,這是一個較好的社會,它保證了我們衣食無虞。在擺脫為生存而努力這一桎梏的當下,為什么我們的教育還有我們自身,不爭脫“名利”疆繩的狹隘束縛,為實現自身價值而投入熱氣騰騰的生活?

    左岸記:文章很好地對“快樂教育”進行了解讀,快樂教育不是讓孩子想做什么就做什么,那樣的快樂是很低層次的,更高級的快樂是通過努力,挑戰了自己的不可能,讓自己得到成長的歡愉。快樂是一種比較,不作為只是一種順應懶惰的享受,永遠也體會不到那種突破自己的喜悅和成就感。至于對“幸福”的定義,我覺得就是“自己發揮了自己能夠擁有的價值”了嗎?而“成功”,就是這個價值讓多少人受益了。

    左岸

    愛讀書,愛生活!

    2 Comments On 別扯犢子了,正是你的不教育廢了你的孩子

    1. 最近也是真正理解了自律對自由的意義,有能力做你想做的事情,也有能力不做你不想做的事情,這才算真的本事。

    2. 都是教育目的不明確倒的鬼,太多的家長急于求成,再加上暴力是最簡單的方式,才會使那文章受人關注

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