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    → 左岸讀書,一如既往。

    個性與風骨何去何從

    2017-08-27 . 閱讀: 868 views

    文/田露

    夜深,耳機里放著蔣勛說紅樓,漸入睡境,卻忽然聽見”嵇康”二字,便又坐起,細細聽之。

    這個名字似乎伴隨了我的中學時代,在那些要交周記卻又缺乏寫作話題的日子里,嵇康便成為了我周記本里的常客。我總是裝作很懂他,很崇拜他的樣子,在文字里替他抒抒情,抱抱不平。只是已經很多很多年沒有聽過這兩個字了,隨之其精神風骨也在我的世界漸漸淡去。如今想來當初也不過是“少年不識愁滋味,為賦新詞強說愁”,湊湊字數罷了。

    說起嵇康這個人,作為竹林七賢的他瀟灑,孤傲。該喝酒喝酒,該高歌高歌,隨時隨地抱著一種“圈子不同不必強融”的人生態度。傳說嵇康雖入官場,然對于他喜歡的人便正眼視之,對于他不喜歡的人則以白眼視之。可謂黑白分明,十分任性。《世說新語》里山濤評價嵇康,說他的為人“巖巖若孤松之獨立”。所以他吸引青年人的其實是他的酷和有個性。而他恃才傲物,不屈不撓,不與小人為伍的人生信條無疑也符合一眾憤青學生的人生追求。于是自然有許多年輕人喜歡他,崇拜他,追隨他。

    但是這種喜歡必然隨著年紀的增長與社會閱歷的豐富而蕩滌殆盡。我們逐漸開始接受一種社會教育叫做“高情商”,說白了就是要學會做人,做一個圓融但安全的人。人情社會是會吃人的。曾經有人對嵇康說:“君才則高矣,保身之道不足”。嵇康的所謂魏晉風骨絕對無法在復雜的人情社會下存活,而他最后也的確是被吃掉了。所以我們開始努力做一個“高情商”的人,笑臉相迎,不顯山不露水,把自己捯飭得光芒晦暗,盡量不被發現,以擺脫被吃掉的命運。

    一開始我們對于個性的壓抑多少有些不適,也曾意圖反抗,但慢慢地我們發現雖然沒什么個性,但生活很順暢,門路很廣闊,辦起事兒來似乎真的比張揚個性容易很多。于是我們開始學著去享受這種壓抑個性帶來的安全感,以至于某一天當我們突然想起那個叫嵇康的古人,突然想起我們曾經的追求,竟是連重新張揚個性的勇氣都沒有了。我們發現自己根本無法承擔因為要個性而被吃掉的人生后果。

    或許有那么一些人真的鼓起了一點點勇氣,打算靠著歸隱來躲避,順便重拾自己所謂的個性。有人去了山中,有人去了水邊,泡泡茶,種種地,似乎真的過起了竹林七賢的生活。然而當初一點點的勇氣終究敵不過生活的壓力、金錢的欲望以及多年形成的不被吃掉的價值觀。于是有人在山中開起了民宿,有人在自媒體做起了營銷,林林總總,終究不過是原點。

    到底個性與風骨何去何從,這份勇氣是終成《廣陵散》絕唱,抑或是有所轉機,盡未可知。

    已是深夜,熄燈睡去,以免失眠。

    來源:汐瀝

    左岸記:英國作家吉普林的《If》,可以解些疑惑:

    如果,身邊的人都失去理智,并將其歸咎于你,
    而你卻能保持清醒;
    如果,所有人都懷疑你,而你卻能自信如常,
    并體諒他們對你的懷疑;
    如果,你能耐心等待,不急不躁,
    或遭人誹謗憎恨,卻不去以牙還牙;
    既不去光彩照人,亦不去才華橫溢。
    如果,你能去夢想,但卻不做夢想的奴隸;
    如果,你能去思辨,而不是為了思考而思考;
    如果,你能以平常心坦然面對失敗和凱旋,
    并懂得,它們其實是幻象;
    如果,你能忍受你說出的真理,被無賴們故意曲解演繹,
    用以誤導愚昧人群;
    或者眼睜睜看著你為之付出一切的珍愛,
    被人摧毀,然后俯拾碎片,
    用老舊的工具去細細修補;
    如果,你敢把所有贏來的人生籌碼堆在一起,
    冒險一搏,卻一把輸光,
    然后從零開始,從不言敗;
    如果,你能讓筋疲力盡的意氣與肌體,
    依然聽從于你僅存的意志,
    告訴自己一定要“堅持”;
    如果,你能和百姓打成一片,卻拒絕隨波逐流;
    或與王者同行,卻不忘,庶民本色;
    如果,無論是宿敵還是摯友,都無法傷害到你;
    如果,所有人對你都很重要,但又沒有誰那么重要;
    如果,你能惜時如金,分秒必爭;
    那么,這個世界就全都屬于你,
    而你,我的兒子,也終將長大成人。

    左岸

    愛讀書,愛生活!

    2 Comments On 個性與風骨何去何從

    1. 這首if太棒了!

    2. 一個很會寫詩的父親,呵。

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