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    → 左岸讀書,一如既往。

    你無法快樂僅僅是因為你不夠單純

    2017-08-17 . 閱讀: 1,279 views

    中國字,基本就是“象形、指事、會意、形聲”,“象形”是個畫畫的過程。但中國書法的書寫里,可以筆意入畫,卻見不得書法像個繪畫,最多也就是追求個韻律感。

    懷素“自敘帖”,稍微看的不順,自己氣都喘不過來,都說中國文化里的“氣”無法科學認定。看些草書行書,就能體會的到。氣息不到,韻律感不強,看了都憋氣。

    以上的想法純屬偶然,只是一個朋友近期在練字,給我展示自己報的課程。里面先不說文房四寶、書法淵源什么的,竟然還有類似《說文解字》,《美學》,《爾雅》,《楚辭》之類的。可能的想法是,書法是中國文化的基石,還是多學點好,涉獵的越多、了解的越多,越愛吧。

    我就說,沒這個必要。練個毛筆字,往大了說是個愛好,往小了說也就是個休閑。練啊練的就練好了,了解的越多,你越失去原始的目的。

    朋友不以為然,說了一大堆,大致意思是說,先如今書法不是個安身立命、決定生活工作的事情,你不這個事情多找點目的性和提升點檔次,未必堅持的下來。

    我說,做人還是要單純點,否則你會失去很多快樂。

    你需要從一件事物上尋點快樂,越單純越好,只要你給一件事情附加越多的意義,你失敗的挫折感越強,你成功的可能性越小。說白了,一件事物,“目的”要做減法,快樂才可能變成加法。

    但人偏偏都是個算盤,還是個擅于自我欺騙的主兒。我們一方面唯恐投入過多,得到太少,自己得不償失。另一方面,不停的增加沉沒成本,讓我們還能堅持下去。都想做個不賠本的買賣,卻一二再再而三的自己騙自己。

    想起去年底,我準備離職,然后找朋友念叨的時候,自然而然數落公司的不是。朋友都是笑笑不說話。而我跟他大談我準備去的新工作,描繪的自然信心滿滿,夢想就在眼前的感覺。

    然后朋友突然就嚴肅起來了:“你離職了么?”

    “沒有啊,準備了。”

    “你是因為新公司好才決定離職,還是因為老公司差?”

    “因為老公司差啊,我覺得沒有希望、不值得付出。”

    “哦,也就是說很早你就在荒廢時間,你覺得不值得付出,所以一直三心二意,騎驢找馬?”

    “還能怎么樣呢?”

    “我說句最矯情的話,你荒廢的永遠是你的時間和機會,你因為現在不快樂,因為期望里的未來而自我感覺良好。你會一直一直的這樣下去的。”

    “道理我都明白,你來給說說,該咋辦。”

    “咋辦?你對現在不滿,就改變,能改變的算是你可以選擇,不能改變的,算是結果,那就離開。單純點、真誠點,對自己也對別人。”

    “呵呵哈哈嘿嘿,說起來容易啊。我們永遠要求別人對自己真誠,但自己對待別人甚至對待自己,都不真誠,你又不是不知道啊。”

    “曉得了就去做唄,你單純點。記住,你是因為厭惡現在,那就選擇結束,其實和未來是否有個大餅沒什么關系。不是因為你有其他的選擇,你才決定離開,而是你有選擇的能力,這個和愛啊、感情啊、事業啊都一樣。”

    “明白了,明白了,永遠不要有忍辱負重的感覺,那些東西都是你強加給自己的,你越單純,你也越快樂,你也越擁有當下,也就懂得選擇。”

    “孺子可教也……”

    “各…溫…,滾!”

    反正“單純”這詞在現代社會,總透點貶義。貌似社會復雜的無以復加,腦子總要學會點閃轉騰挪、兵來將擋。社會和邏輯關系不大,和常識有點牽連;你越直截,他會覺得你越繞;反之,你按著他的路數走了,你越繞他覺得越直截。

    過去廟里,有掛單的師父也有從小出家的師父。

    掛單的師父最輕松,基本以修行為主。

    倒是那些從小出家的師父,打小兒入了廟,就什么活都干、什么位置都呆。

    有些師父有悟性,換的也快,也升的快些。

    也有些一輩子就干一種活兒。

    哪一種是最好的?

    師父會說,最好的是一輩子干一種活的,那真的是修行;

    最不好的,也是一輩子干一種活兒的,因為他一直埋怨自己不該干。

    于是,你不夠單純了,也不夠快樂了。至于所謂的單純,也無非是眼睛看著當下,少看著未來或過去。

    左岸記:單純和幼稚不同,翡柏說得很好:

    單純可以是因為擁有一顆赤子之心,幼稚大多是因為心中什么都沒有。

    出淤泥而不染是單純,無法分辨是非是幼稚。單純是一種品質,幼稚是一種欠缺。

    和單純的人相處你會很輕松,和幼稚的人糾纏,你會很累。

    閱世至深的人可能依然保持單純,那是因為他內心裝有足以抵擋世間各種偽善冷漠的愛與赤誠,單純的人生態度屬于個人選擇。年事已高的人也可能難改幼稚,那是源自他認知能力的欠缺,或由于偏執重導致思考空間有限,或目光淺薄難再從多一個角度看問題。幼稚的人,他無法做出讓自己不幼稚的選擇,因為他并不知道自己幼稚。

    人應該越活越單純,簡單的生活才是最終目的地,這是我始終相信的。也許在生命中途思維與行為模式一度會變得復雜,但那都是為了在未來某一日能做到“化繁為簡”所必須經受的磨礪。生命各個領域其實都是加法容易減法難,若是不能一直擁有單純的生活,那么期待終有一日能擁有單純的心境,擁有因為懂得所以單純的人生態度,也是好的。

    德魯伊Druid

    德魯伊,70后。理工科碩士,喜歡寫作,職業經理人。 人入中年,攜妻帶子,止思踐行,與世界融洽、與自己坦然,充滿快樂生活的勇氣。 “質樸、靈動、喜悅、淡和”是為人生準則,“于人有用,于己有趣”是為人生標準。 文風以毀雞湯、靜心冥想、兒童教育、心理應用等見長。 著有: 《不曾孤獨,怎會懂得》(散文雜文集,作家出版社出版), 《不曾孤獨,怎會懂得 2》(散文雜文集,作家出版社出版), 《沒走過的是路,走過的才是人生》(心智成熟心理學作品,作家出版社出版), 《在疲憊的世間任性的活》(散文雜文集,文匯出版社)

    3 Comments On 你無法快樂僅僅是因為你不夠單純

    1. 學會簡單、學會幽默,學會做減法。

    2. 我喜歡跟單純的直接的交朋友,所謂的一肚子花花腸子還自以為聰明的,真以為別人不知道嗎

    3. 人之所以不快樂就是計較太多,不要把簡單的變得復雜,我覺得簡簡單單的挺好,沒心沒肺的快樂著!

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